I still can't believe Matt Gaetz really looks like that

He's like a cartoon character come to life or a comic make-up job like the Coneheads on old school SNL.

(I know WSJ is subscription, but the post is for that photo, not the article which breaks no new ground.)

He’s a creepy conservative .... it’s just the way those opportunistic assholes look.

As a rule R1, but Gaetz takes it to new heights.

He makes Marcus Bachmann look normal

Gaetz missed his proper calling in life.

He looks like a Southern Baptist preacher than scams his congregation, and lives in a white-columned mansion with an obscenely expensive luxury car parked on the curved driveway in front, next to the enormous, manicured green lawn. The kind that wears $3,000 custom cowboy boots with pointy toes and eagles and red, white and blue shields on them. The kind with a demure Christian housewife that wears Jackie Kennedy sheaths and wears her hair like Lady Bird Johnson.

I guess Gaetz is just having too much fun with underage hookers to bother marrying Lady Bird 2.0. He’s going to be sorry now though, because having a wife and a couple of frilly dressed little girls is about the only thing that can rehabilitate you when you’re up on trafficking charges. And he could blame them for his problems, like Ted Cruz does.

He has a little Eddie Munster in him.

Looks to me like a mix of Ted Kennedy, Nixon and yes, Butthead.

He looks like one of the animals God rejected when making the rodent family.

Does he plan to resign after he’s indicted?

But why? I saw an image with him next to tucker Carlson and their features were not dramatically different. I mean everything in roughly the right places and foreheads even appeared to be the same length. His brows are weird, but it’s kinda creepy how the smallest facial variations can completely fuck your op attractiveness-wise.

Well, they were sort of right ...

Didn't they stop making suits like that in 1978?

He looks like Nixon fucked a muppet.

He’s got a face you just want to punch but good. It’s his eyes, which are a mixture of smug, pompous, conniving, and retarded.

He looks as though he has botox brows.

True, he's not as pretty as some of us in his party are.

He has a Beavis mouth where there's an arched/absent upper lip and you see his top teeth and gums.

Excellent observation, R17!

He looks like he has close ties to Neanderthal DNA, not just teenaged hookers.

He also looks like he might have been born with a cleft palate, but one that wasn’t outwardly visible. He was probably a huge baby with a huge head, and I betcha the mother needed an induced birth to get him out, before he was actually ready to pop, because that head is HUGE.

He’s one of the only people I’ve ever seen that appears to have had cranio-facial anomaly that were just missed by a smidgeon, or were correct by surgery.

Ugly dude, inside & out. News at 11:00.

“Officer, this SMURF came on to my daughter! She’s only 12. This isn’t about politics, I love Trump but this guy is something else! 🤡 “

Glad that I'm not the only one. How any woman would want to sleep with this troglodyte is beyond me. Crepy as hell.

He looks like a Doonesbury character.

r9 Everything is just too much. Huge Easter Island Moai head, huge teeth, five head, pointy nose, the fucking pompadour, everything seems exaggerated. I could go on. Strong features are attractive, but not EVERYTHING. Head is huge square, with a pointy chin too. Makes Jay Leno look normal.

r17 His fiance has the same deal but worse, like HUGE teeth and even huger gums. She's not ugly, but it's really pronounced. Teeth people showing off their gums.

He looks like a male version of Elizabeth Moss.

I'm still perplexed. My Gaydar never fails but I missed this one by a mile. From the first time I saw him until he adopted his adult "son", which he never actually did, he pinged out of control . Never saw the underage girls at all. I'm getting old.

[quote]He has a little Eddie Munster in him.

Unlike Paul Ryan, who has a lot of Eddie Munster in him.

A little off topic but read the excerpt from John Boehners book (link provided). He really talks about witnessing the crazies take over the GOP and Conservative wing in DC...I am no Boehner fan but I believe every word he says.

He looks like a Southern Baptist preacher in a cheap suit in the OP’s photo, but once you see him next to a picture of Butthead you can’t unsee it.

r2 and r30 are correct; he looks exactly like Butthead.

Yes, the Butthead resemblance is uncanny.

Sometimes we joke that people look like certain cartoon characters, but he really does look exactly like Butthead

He looks like Rush Limbaugh and Max Headroom had a baby together.

Is that Nestor in the background R34?

Maybe his son is his dealer or procurer.

Keep in mind that this is the dude with at least a dozen mug shots and got off thanks to daddy. He’s used to getting away with shit, sorta like Trump. He’ll never resign.

At least he was smart enough to adopt, and at a good enough age to know Nestor would be handsome, and not pass on that miserable DNA and those looks.

My guess is his cock is huge.

Some people cant help but be cunts

His Mom is Butthead’s sister. She fucked Nixon and this scab is the result. Another ugly Deplorable.

Well done R39

Using the word "cunt" in a DL thread, like posting "present hole" will guarantee you WWs regardless as to whether the comment warranted it.

He looks exactly what he is.

There is no need to be kind and explain this away, he is a creep.

He's a rough looking 38 too.

He looks like Brian Peppers!

R45 omfg. He looks like a fucking horror movie ghoul.

[quote]He has a little Eddie Munster in him.

Leave me out of this.

R35, yes, that's Nestor on the couch. It's before the big reveal that he's a dad with a son. He calls the guy on the couch his "helper."

I do not get “big dick” vibes from Gaetz.

R49 quite the contrary. He seems to overcompensate to such an extreme that it screams multiple and plenty of shortcomings.

R49, His bare feet are huge in that Instagram photo where he's wearing shorts and sandals with a shirt, tie and suit jacket.

I can't believe anyone would fuck someone that looks like that

He really has the worse suits - very Florida car salesman.

No one fucks that willingly. He has to pay for it every time.

We have a pretty good idea of how he will age.

"He really has the worse suits"

Oh, dear!

^^ I don’t understand why it’s hard for people to grasp the difference between ‘worse’ and ‘worst’. This is like first grade vocabulary.

He's caricaturish, like a 'Spitting Image' puppet.

R59 Not to mention wurst.

On the other hand, one understands why he has to pay for sex.

Spitting Image is a great call R60!

He really got the face he deserves

He looks like the before, but there’s no after.

What an ugly son of a bitch.

He looks like a Dick Tracy villain.

I saw him give a super creepy interview where he was describing something the hatchet faced woman from Georgia said and he said something about it being so great he smoked a cigarette after. And the way he said it like he expected a "parum-pum" and it just didn't land made him look so insane. It's gross when unattractive people try to talk sexy or sexual and it just doesn't fit their look. It was just awkward and embarrassing.

Ridiculous. No one fucks that without being paid, first.

I want to hate fuck him. He is so decadently low and slimy. I’ll lube up and take him in one mighty thrust, balls deep. Bareback of course.

His dick looks like a baby's thumb.

Make sure you get the cash upfront, r70

He is just not attractive in any way shape or form. Not one attractive physical trait.

He’s chili dog you r70.

He looks like a homicidal game show host.

the home at this address appears to be owned by Nathan Nelson, a former Gaetz staffer who according to his LinkedIn was Gaetz's Director of Military Affairs, and left October 2020.

Here;'s the happy couple on Fox and Friends. Who has a press conference at their home? Wasn't the Motel 6 available?

In a way, it would be terrible if he looked great.

So what’s he going to say? The FBI made it all up and they’re lying? I don’t think they’re going to take that very well. When you’re in deep, stop digging.

He looks like fellow conservative Chris O'Donnell.

OK, in R76 and the Fox clips he’s had botox.

For all the press about his makeup bag, you’d think he’d understand contouring. With the smooth forehead, he’s making a flat moon face that barely reaches under his neck. He’s probably stained some shirts.

The laughable part of Tucker’s interview was that they wore matching Trump Orange makeup.

maybe this is the reason that he had to pay hookers for a date night, and I believe him, the payment/gift/travel/lodging etc is an act of kindness and generosity, girls were strictly compensated for their time and companionship, there were no sex involved.

His face and hand are two different shades. Does this creep wear face makeup?

^ That’s a definite “Yes” like his idol, Dump! Bronze face, white hands. What I want to know is why he doesn’t get his sleeves to his jackets made longer. He looks like a doll. A bobble head.

Gaetz is a notorious diaper fetishist, like David Vitter. What is it about Republican politicians and the adult baby scene?

[quote] the home at this address appears to be owned by Nathan Nelson, a former Gaetz staffer who according to his LinkedIn was Gaetz's Director of Military Affairs, and left October 2020

I wonder if they are going to throw him to the wolves or try to say the FBI is making this all up?

I kind of hope it's the latter. If that's the case this will be some rudy giuliani type craziness

[quote] His face and hand are two different shades. Does this creep wear face makeup?

Yes he does. He actually shows people his "routine"

[quote] For all the press about his makeup bag, you’d think he’d understand contouring. With the smooth forehead, he’s making a flat moon face that barely reaches under his neck. He’s probably stained some shirts.

It's makeup. It's not magic. Nothing is going to improve that Beevis faced fucker

OP, when I first saw that CPAC pic, I thought it was photoshopped.

I'll take "Hung like a Tic-Tac" for $200, Alex.

[quote] Nothing is going to improve that Beevis [SIC] faced fucker

It's BUTTHEAD, R91

Gaetz looks like Butthead.

Gym Jordan is the one who looks like Beavis

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